I hate the WordPress iPad app!
Last night I wrote the best post! I mean, it was one of my greatest post, so far! But! Oh yes, there is a but! Before I hit “publish” I tried to insert a pic. WordPress came back with an error about the size of something, and gave me the choice to “discard.” Well, silly me, I thought they meant discard the pic, not my entire post! And the app doesn’t auto save like a computer! So poof, my masterpiece blog post is gone! Disappeared into the inter-webs!
I won’t try to recreate it. I’ll just tell you, it was about my being to pridefull to ask for help. And how I’m stubborn, like a three-year-old who won’t accept help tying her shoes, retorting, “I can do it by myself!” Only to trip over the untied shoe strings later! I swear, if I were drowning and you threw me a life raft, I’d throw it back and say, “no, no, I’ll be fine, I can do it!”
Why am I so stubborn? Why do I not ask for help, when help is so desperately needed? I narrowed it down to three possibilities. 1) Motherhood! I should be all things to all people. I am not needy, I am the one who shows up when others are in need! 2) I don’t want to owe anyone anything. “Do me a favor and don’t do me no favors!” This was engrained in me by my abusive ex-husband. Old habits die hard! 3) I don’t want to be like my sisters. They tend to take advantage of their “disabilities” and ask a lot more of people than they should! They are cheating themselves out of the opportunity to be better! I don’t want to be like that. Ever!
So, the point is, pride goeth before the fall!
– J. Ela