I’m going to have to retract something from my last post. About what’s the worst part about all of this… It’s not the putting on the happy face. Ya, that sucks a big one! But, hands down, the worst part… Picking up my phone fifty times a day to call or text. Seeing something, hearing something, reading something… Thinking immediately, oh G- would love that. Pick up the phone. Send a text or email. Call to say hey! I’m surprised Verizon hasn’t called to check on me! To find out why the incoming/outgoing has all but stopped. Wow, you just don’t even realize how big a part of your life someone is… until they’re not! I wonder if this is happening to him too? Or is he rolling right along without a second thought? Or did something happen at work, he’s dying to tell me. Because I’ll understand, when others wouldn’t. Does he worry that I’m alive even? Or does he care? Is he as depressed as I am? Not likely. Not my G-. I’m sure he’s doing just fine. As fine as he was before we were friends.
– J. Ela